Dad jokes. They can be hilarious, gag-inducing, or just downright embarrassing. The true tell of a good dad joke is, of course, in the eye of the beholder.
We have a few beholders here who are more than happy to share their true-blue reactions to some of the best dad jokes we could find on the internet (in honor of Father’s Day, of course). Ready? Here we go:
What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.
An IMPASTA! Did you guys HEAR that? Now THAT is what I call comedy.
So we’ll admit – Marx is a bit of an easy crowd. And to be honest, if you’re planning on adopting him, we suggest you be an easy crowd too (read: see the humor in everything, take naughtiness and Husky-type characteristics as positive traits rather than annoyances). He’s a pretty easygoing guy as far as Huskies go…but a sense of humor certainly won’t hurt. 😉
Alright, let’s try a cat this time:
Want to hear a joke about paper? Never mind, it’s tearable.
Sorry – was I supposed to laugh at that? I must have missed the memo.
Ava’s not one to laugh at a joke just to spare your feelings. But she’s not exactly a party pooper, either. This sassy girl is more of a comedy critic – she loves humor, she’d just prefer you put a little more effort into a joke. And unlike a lot of cats, she’d fit in pretty well with outgoing, active peeps. Just don’t forget to throw that toy for her.
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.
Have you guys considered stand-up? ‘Cause that was great. Keep ’em coming!
Thanks, Romy. We love your enthusiasm.
Romy is on the shy side but she wants you to know there’s more to her than just a shy exterior. She’s a good buddy, she’ll obviously laugh at your jokes, and she’d make a good pal to another dog. Plus, did we mention she would laugh at your jokes? Even most of your friends won’t do that. You obviously need to meet Romy.
What do you call someone with no body and just a nose? Nobody knows.
Is that what passes for comedy these days? That’s absurd. You can do better.
Thanks, Snowman. We’ll try to take that as a compliment.
Snowman may come off as a bit of a snob, but it’s just because his standards are high. He’s beautiful, used to being adored, and realizes he 100% deserves this kind of treatment. So by all means, come give it to him.
What’s brown and sticky? A stick.
That’s great! I was just thinking that about sticks!
Oh, sweet Mateo. We don’t doubt that at all. At just 2 years old, this energetic boy probably DOES spend a lot of time thinking about sticks. And balls. And playtime. And hikes. And…you get the picture. He’s a big teddy bear who likes to squish up in your lap once he’s gotten his share of run-like-a-madman time. See for yourself!
When I found out my toaster wasn’t waterproof…. I was shocked.
I feel like I should be offended at the terribleness of this joke.
Sorry about that, Cersei. We’ll certainly do better next time.
Like her namesake, Cersei is regal with a capital R. But unlike her namesake, she’s not a total narcissistic jerk. She’s an outgoing, playful girl who kinda reminds us more of a dog than a cat. Or to be more accurate, she’s the best of both worlds.
Seeing a pattern here? Our cats have high standards. They don’t laugh at your dad jokes because they know it’s not your best work, and really, all a cat wants is for you to be your best self. And that’s pretty darn inspiring, right?
On the other hand, if you’re just looking for someone to give your lame jokes a good-natured giggle, our dogs are more than happy to do the trick (get it? Dogs do tricks? Sorry, we can’t help ourselves. We’re on a roll, here).
Either way you go, you can’t lose. Because for a limited time (until Father’s Day, actually – weird coincidence, right?) all adult cats and dogs have only a $20 adoption fee.
Oops, sorry Squeaks. We promise we didn’t forget about you. AHEM. All adult cats, dogs, AND KITTENS have only a $20 adoption fee through Sunday. Our bad. Hey kitten – how do you feel about dad jokes? Want to try one? Here you go:
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
Ah, well. It appears the kittens learn young. Can’t say we didn’t try.
Anyways, we digress. If you want to adopt one of these comic-loving kids, be sure to come by this weekend. Start working on your material now, folks.